Yup, grant crankiness time. As part of the current grant application, I need to assemble details of every grant currently held and applied for by all eight of the PIs - title, dates, source, amount, PI and co-applicants, % effort for all investigators, goals, and % overlap with the current proposal. There are a grand total of 53 grants - oh the joys of working with bigshots! I then need to assemble this list into a PDF which is also to include the abstract of every grant, in the same order as in the list of grant details.
Combining the 54 PDFs is a real barrel of laughs. My computer is old and grumpy at the best of times, and doesn't take too kindly to opening multiple files. Plus of course Acrobat only lets you open a certain number of files at once. So I have to batch them.
Now, being an organised sort of person, I give all my files and folders very logical names. Wouldn't you think that Acrobat would recognise this logic and list my files in the right order?
Well, you'd think wrong. Every time I start to combine a batch of PDFs, I get a list of open files that looks something like this:
and have to manually drag the files into the right order.
...working on an extremely cool grant, due Wednesday. I want this one to get funded soooo badly - the science is so cool and the potential impact so great. I wish I could blog about it!
what would the scientific worldview be like for someone, let's say, just starting graduate school today (and therefore about 22 years of age)? Born in 1988, how would their scientific lives differ from the lives of the generations preceding them (including mine, which is the only one I really care about)? It makes for some interesting speculation:
there follows a list of techniques that have always been outdated (or routine) in these students' lifetimes. Some examples:
• In their lifetime, no one has ever pipetted anything by mouth.
• Believe it or not, they have never known a world without cDNA microarrays.
Worth reading despite the feelings of advanced age that will inevitably follow. As Beth said on Twitter, "That makes me feel old. In MY day, we had to look at DNA one gene at a time! Uphill both ways in the snow!"
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1. which "provides a look at the cultural background of the students entering college that fall. The creation of Beloit's Keefer Professor of the Humanities Tom McBride and former Public Affairs Director Ron Nief, it was originally created as a reminder to the Beloit faculty to be aware of dated references. As the website notes, 'it quickly became a catalog of the rapidly changing worldview of each new generation.'"
It always seems to take me a while to write blog posts about my favourite trips, probably because I'm in denial about them being over. So the fact that it's taken me almost a month to start writing this post is a good indication that it was an amazing adventure in my new favourite kayaking destination!
The start of the trip was an almost exact replica of our last one - drive, ferry, drive, stay at mother-in-law's, drive, ferry, drive, buy food and other supplies*, drive - but instead of continuing up the road to Lund, we turned right and headed for the kayak rental company's other location, in Okeover Inlet. As before, we'd booked a beast of a double kayak with a central hatch for all our gear, but got loaded up and in the water in record time. In fact we beat the couple next to us, who'd started loading a good half an hour before we did!
Come on you blues!
There was much friendly banter between us as we raced to launch... and again as we crossed their path on a brief trip back to the beach to retrieve Mr E Man's hat... and yet again as we passed them on our way back up the inlet, heading for Desolation Sound proper.
Approximate routes
This part of the trip was pleasant enough, with nice cabins dotted about on the wooded slopes of the low-lying hills. As usual after a long land-locked spell, it was bliss just to be back out on the water, feeling the rhythm of the paddle strokes and enjoying the sights, sounds and smells of the ocean. The cabins became more widely dispersed as we passed from Okeover into Malaspina Inlet, but I was beginning to be ever so slightly disappointed in the low-lying hills, the signs of habitation, and the lack of any wildlife.
All this changed, however, when we turned right into Desolation Sound itself. There was some chop and some rebound waves to cope with as we rounded the point, but we've been through much, much worse before, and our heavily loaded double kayak wasn't going to flip unless we wanted it to**. But even as we zig-zagged around to make sure none of the many waves and boat wakes hit us broadside, we were already starting to admire the snow-capped mountains at either end of the Sound, and seeing an abundance of seals and eagles.
Calmer water = photo time!
We found an island to camp on for the night, and apologised to the couple on the beach for disturbing their solitude. They very kindly helped us to carry the kayak up the sloping, stony beach to above the high tide line - even when empty it was a struggle for me to lift my end - and we had a nice chat with them before staking out our campsite, a short walk through the woods away. They'd recently retired and had driven an RV over from Alberta with two kayaks strapped to the roof, and were spending the whole summer on the BC coast, interspersing week-long kayak trips with more luxurious RV camping in various locations. I immediately started formulating "get rich quick and retire immediately" plans in my head (still working on it. I'll let you know if I make any progress. Or maybe I'll just buy an RV and some kayaks and bugger off and you won't ever hear from me again).
We got the tent up and went for a swim. Unlike on Savary and the Copelands (our last new favourite kayaking destinations), which as you can see from the map are very close to Desolation Sound but in a less sheltered piece of water, the water was gorgeous; cool enough to be refreshing, but warm enough to swim in for extended periods of time. And it was clear, and surprisingly fresh, for ocean water. There must be some massive rivers and/or glaciers feeding into the Sound somewhere, because the water didn't taste all that salty, and even after swimming multiple times a day for five days in a row, we didn't get that icky crusty salty feeling on our skin or hair.
We had a yummy gourmet hot-dog dinner, and settled in for the night as soon as it got dark. We could hear people in the cabins on the mainland shore, and on the many boats moored in the channel between our island and the mainland, but they all quietened down within an hour and I had a surprisingly good night's sleep, for a camping trip.
On our second day we re-loaded the kayak, said goodbye to our Albertan neighbours, and headed for our main destination. We'd heard that the Curme Islands were gorgeous, but "overrun with kayakers in the summer", according to one source. However, having started our trip on a Friday, rather than a Saturday, we thought we might have a head start on the BC Day long weekend traffic.
And so it proved to be! We saw one or two other kayakers on our crossing on calm waters over to the privately owned Mink Island, but they were mostly day trippers from boats and cabins. We were the first paddlers to reach the Curme group, and had a choice of several islands. We chose the one with the outhouse, and bagged the best of the three main tent sites: close to the landing beach (although we had to lift the boat up several levels of rock steps to get it above the high tide line, which took ages due to my wussy little girl muscles), with a dining room set made of driftwood logs, and with rocks behind us from which to fish, jump into the ocean, or watch the sunset.
After we got the tent up we explored our new home, and declared it to be the best campsite either of us had ever seen. The terrain was similar to that of the Copeland Islands, but with much sparser tree coverage and hence better views in all directions. At one point Mr E Man stuck the camera in my face without warning and said "do a video for your blog where you walk people through the island as if it's our new summer home". So here it is! (Sorry about the low volume - this was our regular camera rather than our actual video camera, and we forgot that the mic isn't as good).
As well as the AmericanCanadian bald eagles, we saw oyster catchers, gulls, vultures, humming birds, squirrels, mice, and dozens and dozens of seals.
And here are some views from the other side of the island (spoiled only slightly by some water on the lens):
I swear I don't work for Tourism BC, I just really really like it here
We kept expecting more kayakers to show up, but luckily when a group did come they chose another island, and we had ours completely to ourselves all day and all night. We cooked another yummy dinner, and settled in on the West-facing rock behind our campsite to watch the gorgeous sunset.
Yes, I wear socks with my beloved Keens in the evenings when I'm camping (because of the mosquitoes). So sue me.
Smoke from distant forest fires makes for spectacular sunsets
Sun down = bed time!
After another surprisingly decent night's sleep we got out of the tent early the next morning to find another beautiful day waiting for us, and jumped straight off a rock and into the ocean to celebrate. This was the only time on the whole trip I ever felt cold. After a brief swim and some breakfast, we hauled the kayak back down onto the beach in a series of painful steps (the low tides were all at really inconvenient times on this trip!), and set off on a day trip to Tenedos Bay. It was another gorgeous paddle, followed by a short walk through the woods to Unwin Lake for a freshwater swim. Unfortunately we had to clamber over a bunch of floating and semi-floating driftwood logs to get to the water... like that bit in Insomnia... this is the kind of thing I have nightmares about, and I fell off once into some shallow water and got covered in stinking black mud (and scraped my leg in the process), so I wasn't exactly happy. The lake was nice though,
It turns out that it's really difficult to take self-portraits while treading water
and we met the couple we'd raced against to load and launch on day one. They were looking for a new campsite after being a little disappointed in how crowded their first two had been, so we told them how great our island was, and they promised to check it out.
After a couple of hours of enjoying the really very pleasant lake, Mr E Man said what I'd been thinking: "this is nice, but it's not as nice as our campsite. I love our campsite. It's awesome". So we agreed to head back to base to see who had invaded our island while we'd been gone. The couple we'd talked to had, as had one other couple and another group of four much younger kayakers, but we were still nicely spread out and everyone had their own space and privacy.
Our new friends from the loading beach and the lake were surviving on freeze-dried food, whereas we had an overabundance of real food, so we shared our pasta dinner with them in exchange for some additional wine. After dinner the other couple joined the four of us on the sunset rock with yet more wine (the group of four younger paddlers kept to themselves), and we all proceeded to spend an extremely lovely evening chatting and getting pleasantly drunk together as the sun went down (and for a few hours afterwards too).
After a not so good night's sleep (too much wine), our drinking partners all left for home or for pastures new. Mr E Man and I had a swim and then a discussion over breakfast, and decided that we really weren't going to find anywhere better than where we already were (based on our own observations and on tales from our new friends), and that lifting the kayak up and down all the rocky ledges was going to be more trouble than it was worth. So we celebrated BC Day by spending a lazy day at camp: swimming, playing cards, swimming, playing Scrabble, swimming, reading, swimming, eating, and swimming. It was bliss, and we felt no guilt at all about our "enjoy the destination" mode of ocean kayaking***.
Improving our "taking self portraits while treading water" technique slightly.
Some new kayakers showed up, and we pointed out the best campsites and chatted briefly, but they seemed inclined to keep to themselves, as did the younger paddlers when they returned from their day trip. But yet again we had a fabulous evening chatting and snuggling and watching the sunset and drinking the last of the wine.
That night I crawled into the tent to sleep, little suspecting the horrors that awaited me. The first three nights had been fine, with little more than the sound of the waves to disturb my sleep, so I'd been lulled into a false sense of security. This made it all the worse when I was awoken at about 2:45 am by The Noise.
It was a kind of combination barking/snorting/coughing/teeth chomping noise. Definitely an animal. A big animal. A big, loud, scary animal. The Noise started on one side of the tent, then moved to the other.
Unbelievably, Mr E Man was still asleep at this point. But not for long, because I switched on the flashlight that hangs from the ceiling of our tent and started shaking him and frantically whispering "DO YOU HEAR THAT???!!! I THINK THERE'S A BEAR!!!!!!"
As a born and bred Canadian, Mr E Man does not share my terror of bears. I keep trying to explain to him that to Europeans, big scary animals with huge teeth that live in the woods and make scary noises are the domain of fairy tales, things that frighten and thrill you when you're a kid, but aren't supposed to be real. So when we do something ridiculously foolhardy like move to Canada, we freak the hell out as our childhood nightmares come to life.
Or something.
Anyway, Mr E Man initially seemed freaked out by the noise too, but then calmly tried to talk me out of my own fear by saying "it's probably a seal. Maybe a sea lion. It's low tide, right? It's probably eating those oysters and clams we saw on the beach when we arrived at low tide".
Yeah, nice try dude. Bears swim and eat shellfish too - our new friends had met someone who'd had a bear wander through his nearby island campsite the day before, also at low tide - and anyway I've heard seals and sea lions, and they just don't make that kind of noise. Or move that fast, on land (The Noise was moving. A lot).
At this point Mr E Man realised that I was too scared to be talked down, so he decided to get out of the tent to see what was happening. Bear spray in one hand and air horn in the other, he peered bravely out into the darkness, but couldn't see anything. A new and slightly different (chompier) occurrence of The Noise, closer this time, persuaded him that he really didn't want to startle or otherwise disturb the maker of The Noise, so he slipped discretely back into the tent. Luckily The Noise soon started to gradually move a little further away, and after a couple of hours of listening intently into the night while sitting up facing the door of the tent, gripping the can of bear spray with white knuckles, I relaxed enough to fall back asleep (Mr E Man had been snoring away within a few minutes of getting back into the tent).
I left the light on, though.
I'd had maybe 20 minutes of sleep when The Noise came back, closer than ever. It was now 5:45 and starting to get light, but it was still too dark for courage. I shook poor Mr E Man awake again, and he declared that he absolutely had to know what it was, and picked up the air horn and bear spray again. I begged him not to go outside - The Noise sounded different, more aggressive somehow, than it had earlier - and he reluctantly relented. After another half hour or so The Noise was gone for good, taking my capacity for sleep along with it.
Of course, as soon as it was properly light and I was brave (or at least slightly braver) again, I regretted not finding out what had been making The Noise. We looked everywhere for prints or scat, but none were to be found on the rocks or scrubby grass and parched, hard crust of soil. Our bag of food, hanging on the end of a rope slung over a tree branch that we'd thought was probably too low, was undisturbed. Our neighbours had all heard The Noise, too, and everyone thought it was a bear. Even Mr E Man says that the more he thinks about it, the more he agrees that it couldn't have been a seal or sea lion. (Our neighbours had met someone who'd claimed to have seen a couple of wolves a few kilometres away the week before, but that's just silly).
Anyway, the thought of The Noise made me feel slightly better about having to leave our idyllic island campsite and head home. We had one last swim before hauling the kayak back down to the beach, packing up, and retracing our route from the first two days, back along the Sound, round the point, and into the Malaspina and Okeover Inlets. It was another nice paddle, although after the splendour of the last few days, the last hour's scenery seemed rather tame and pedestrian in comparison.
Overall it was an amazing trip and I got out of the kayak at the end covered in bruises, bug bites, sun burn, blisters, cuts and scrapes, but with a grin as wide as the Sound itself. Great weather, spectacular scenery, gorgeous campsites, great people, good times. Yes there are scary noises in the dark, but hey, now that I've had a bear in my campsite at night (one of my worst nightmares) and survived unscathed, maybe I'll be a bit braver in future.
A very little bit.
Maybe.
My fear of clambering over floating driftwood logs remains intact, but I'm not going to let that get in the way of more kayaking trips, either.
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*shopping while hungry caused a serious kayak hatch overload problem. We ate a ton of food, gave some away, and still brought a whole bunch back. Maybe next time Mr E Man will take my "let's plan meals in advance and make a shopping list" idea more seriously.
**having said that, I feel more vulnerable in the front of a double than I do in a single or in the back of a double. It's all about having control of your own rudder - without that control over my direction I get a bit nervous in choppy water!
***in the past, we've gone kayaking with people whose idea of a good trip is to cover as much distance as they possibly can each day. To each their own... but what we like most about kayaking is the access you get to beautiful, isolated camping spots. So we try to enjoy them as much as we can once we get there. Also, we're a wee bit lazy.
Would the sight of vultures circling overhead affect your decision making?
(is there a fresh bear kill in the woods, or are they waiting for the siren dinner bell?)
This was our final choice.
It seemed to be a good one.
This was our Sunday lunchtime cool-down during The Big Time Out, a music festival in Cumberland on Vancouver Island. The record-breaking heat (something like 36C on Saturday - that's 97F) may have affected my opinion somewhat, but I have to say that while it was a fun weekend and an amazing setting,
the line-up was a bit of a disappointment. Lots of "this is OK" or "oh, these guys have some decent stuff", not much "WOW, these guys are AWESOME!"
Saturday was especially meh - the opening act was the best one all day, and while the headliners (Broken Social Scene) were also very good, the penultimate band had managed to suck most of the energy out of the crowd by the time they came on, so it was all a bit muted.
Sunday was better - the dip in the river was better preparation for the day than sweating in the tiny patch of shade thrown by our hastily rigged tarp had been the day before. But while the headliner K'naan rocked the house as usual, he didn't have any new songs; it was essentially the same set we saw him do in Vancouver in March 2009. I guess a whole year spent on the World Cup music tour precludes much writing of new material. But still, great set, and he and a couple of other bands we saw over the two days (Ruby Jean and the Thoughtful Bees, Vitaminsforyou, Mutaytor, Kim Churchill, and especially Tambura Rasa) inspired some happy "dancing barefoot on the grass" moments in me. And as this was a very small festival, there was a really nice friendly atmosphere with lots of happy people and little kids running around all over the place. All very different to my previous music festival experiences - all in Scotland, at massive events with two stages, multiple gig tents, fairgrounds, and drunken Scots everywhere!
Overall though, my main impression of the event was of overwhelming, baking heat. Oh, except at night, when it was freezing! There was about an hour of comfortable temperature in the morning, and maybe a couple of hours in the evening, but the rest of the time was spent either sweating buckets and trying not to move, or shivering in all the clothes I'd brought. The festival and adjacent campsite were in an open field, with very little shade. We got lucky and bagged a spot next to the fence, so we pooled resources (tarps and blankets) with one of our neighbours to set up a small patch of (still baking hot) shade between the fence and our tents. The poor people who arrived later and camped in the middle of the field had no shade at all though. It's rained at every single other music festival I've ever been to - on one memorable occasion at T in the Park in Scotland it got so muddy that some of the tents in the sloping campsite started to slide downhill - and that's always miserable and muddy and nasty, but surely there's a happy medium somewhere!
In these circumstances, we declared this frozen mango impaled on a stick
to be the best thing ever invented in the history of humanity. I literally felt new energy flooding back into my poor heat-sensitive Celtic body as I ate it.
Mmmmmm, mangogasm.
There was also the usual lack of sleep that you get at festivals. The tents were all packed in like sardines, and some of our other neighbours were the loudest, douchiest, most obnoxious people on the site. Their conversation kept everyone in the vicinity awake from 1 - 5:30 am on the first night as one guy shared tales of all his sexual conquests in quite an aggressive, nasty way (and repeated everything at least once to make sure he'd been heard). At one point I whispered to Mr E Man "wow, that guy must have a really, really small penis", and after that we referred to him as Douchebag McTinydick, which made us feel better - as did the news Mr E Man overheard on Monday morning that the whole group had been so hungover and tired after that night that they fell asleep in their camp chairs and missed K'naan on the Sunday!
Karma - don't you just love it?!
Like I say though, overall it was a good weekend, with the swim in the river being the highlight. Oh, and we saw dolphins from the ferry on the way back, which was awesome! We might go back to The Big Time Out in the future, depending on the line-up (and the weather forecast), but our shade-sharing neighbour also gave us lots of tips about other small festivals she's been to around BC that are apparently much better. There's a jazz / world music festival in Kaslo (a nine hour drive from Vancouver) where the stage floats on a lake, and the crowd can wade in the lake up to their waists while listening.
Until this week, I would have said that my super-powers are limited to the following:
Locating any spider's web within a 5 metre radius, using only my face
Locating submerged rocks in the ocean, using only my bare feet
Turning wine into water
However, over the last few days I have not only caused a peer-reviewed paper to be retracted, but also influenced the outcome of the upcoming US House of Representatives elections.
Inadvertent, but still impressive.
The paper retraction came about as a result of a tweet I posted after spotting something unusual in my journal table of contents RSS feeds:
The editor of the journal left comments on all the posts the next day, saying that the paper was being retracted, and apologising for the mistake! See Bob's comment thread for one example.
Blimey, I wasn't expecting THAT when I rattled off that quick tweet! I almost feel guilty*, except that the paper really was very bizarre and unscientific. I'm all in favour of the occasional silly entry in the peer reviewed literature (e.g. here), but feel that it should be marked as such, or made obvious by the date of publication. April 1st springs to mind... Also, it appears that at least one of the authors had intended the paper as a serious attempt at thought provocation.
I think the comments around the internet about "humourless atheists" are off-base, though - most of the comments I've read are full of humourous piss-taking!
My influence over the US elections came about as a result of this book review. Apparently the author is currently running for office as a US Representative, and someone who lives in that district found my book review when Googling all the candidates. This voter then emailed me yesterday, to thank me - he explained that he has a rule against voting for creationists, and based on my review he's decided not to vote for the book's author!
(For the record, I'm not sure that the author's an out-and-out old-skool religious creationist. From what I've read in the book and then in his comments on my review post, I'd classify him more as a proponent of some weird modified form of intelligent design).
I'm thinking that this might be a good week to buy a lottery ticket.
My Computer files and email inbox are awash, overflowing, drowning in the acronyms used by various funding agencies, academic institutes, media outlets, and assorted other organisations.
I'm sure many of my readers have the same issue. However, my problem is Compounded by working on (mainly) Breast Cancer in British Columbia, Canada - with American, British, and Canadian Collaborators. So the same letters tend to occur over and over:
A is for Agency, Alberta, Alliance, America, American, or Association
B is for Breast, British, or Broadcasting
C is for Canada, Canadian, Cancer, Center, Centre, Centres, Collaborative, Columbia, Consortium, Corporation, or Council
F is for Foundation or Fund
I is for Innovation, Institute, or Institutes
N is for National or Network
S is for Science or Society
R is always for research and H is always for Health, for which I suppose I should be grateful.
Put any of these letters together in any Combination, and I probably have a matching folder somewhere.
Let's see, I have folders for the following: AACR, ACRI, BCCA, BCCRC, BCCF, CBC, CBCF, CBCRA, CCSRI, CFI, CIHR, CRUK, GBC, NCE, NCI, NCIC, NIH, NSERC, and OICR.
So today, Checking my Credit Card Balance online, I was Confused to see a payment to an entity Called BCF.
Very Confused.
Was there a new player in town? The British Columbia Foundation? The Breast Cancer Fund? The Broadcasting Centre Foundation? British Central Fund? Boring Christmas Food?Burgeoning Cat Fur? Big Chaotic Frenzy? Bring Cath Fudge?
And why the Bloody Cockeyed Fuck am I giving them money??!!
Until I realised the item was related to our upcoming trip to Vancouver Island.
A trip that necessitates paying a reservation fee to BC Ferries.
Exhibit B: (background: these are comments on my status update about not being able to get my hands on an iPhone 4 yet. Between my original update and these comments, I'd posted a second update about how I was at the dentist watching the news on the ceiling TV and my dentist suddenly stopped to ask if I was OK because I'd involuntarily winced - as if in pain - when Stephen Harper appeared on the screen).
It's almost as much fun as blogging about dental floss!
My sister-in-law got me a "puzzle of the day" desk calendar for Christmas. She apologised profusely for not getting me anything "better" (by which she meant "more expensive"), but honestly it's one of the best presents I got! Some of the puzzles are dumb, but lots of them are really fun, and just occasionally there's a science or maths themed entry that provides me with excellent blog fodder.
This one's a set of geometry-related anagrams, perfect for a Friday quiz for my readers!
ALARM GALLOPER is PARALLELOGRAM (PIKA)
BARLEY HOP is HYPERBOLA (BOB)
EARTH RODENT is TETRAHEDRON (BOB)
GREY TIN MOTOR is TRIGONOMETRY (ARINK)
HOP DEARLY is POLYHEDRA (SILVER FOX)
NUCLEAR DIPPER is PERPENDICULAR (PIKA)
PRIME TREE is PERIMETER (PIKA)
READ TIME is DIAMETER (ARINK)
RELATE QUAIL is EQUILATERAL (ARINK)
SEES COILS is ISOSCELES (BOB)
TO SCRIBE is BISECTOR (PIKA)
UPSET HONEY is HYPOTENUSE (BOB)
Answer in the comments - but please submit only one answer per person per hour, to give as many people as possible a chance to play before Bob attempts to sweep the board like he did last time. Oh, and there's no need to answer in the right order - choose any anagram you like!
I'll update the post with the answers and bragging rights as and when I get time, and I'll add clues if there are any unanswered questions after a day or two.
I'm back from my trip with more photos than I can reasonably fit into a blog post, so please bear with me while I attempt to cull the collection! Until then, it's enough to say that it was an amazing experience that proved once again that there is simply nowhere else I'd rather be than the BC coast in summer.
Luckily, I have plenty of post ideas that don't require any agonising decisions over which photos to ditch. Here's one about a dream I had the night before we launched.
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In my dream, I was on one of my twice-annual trips to San Diego to meet with collaborators. As always, I was part of a group from my institute that consisted of four or five PIs plus me, and after an interesting first day of meetings, our wonderful hosts had taken us out for a wine-soaked dinner on a sunny patio. One of the senior hosts had brought a friend, but forgot to introduce him to the group. The friend told a distinctly unfunny joke... and then got in my face angrily demanding to know why I hadn't laughed. When I replied that I was sorry but I just didn't think the joke was all that funny, he yelled "WHY DO YOU HATE AMERICA???!!!", tipped my chair backwards, threw a bag over my head, and man-handled me into a vehicle. I could hear everyone at our table loudly protesting and saying they were going to call the cops, and my assailant shouting "I'm the head of the fucking CIA! Call the fucking cops, they won't do nothing!!!!"
I was taken to a tiny, dark cell filled with people, had the bag roughly pulled off my head, and was told that I would rot in jail. I had all my belongings taken from me* and was not allowed to call my husband, my boss, or the Canadian (or British) embassy.
My cellmates asked what had happened, and when I told them they said "DUDE!!! You always laugh at the head of the CIA's jokes!"
After a long and scary night, and then many hours of waiting the following day, I was finally summoned from the cell and told I was free to go. The desk staff were clearly embarrassed, and one female officer apologised for her boss's drunken temper tantrum as she handed me back my belongings. "He's just an ass", she explained helpfully, and called me a cab.
I asked the cab driver to take me to our collaborators' facility, where I found the second day of meetings in full flow, with one of our PIs in the middle of a PowerPoint presentation and people excitedly asking lots of questions. Everyone looked round as I entered, and someone said "oh good, they let you go then?"
"Why the fuck didn't you come and get me??!!" I demanded, not unreasonably given the circumstances.
"Sorry Cath", said one of our PIs. "We were going to, but the conversation about our latest next-gen sequencing results just got soooo interesting! Look at this slide, this is a totally novel finding!"
Cue me waking up, equal parts disturbed and amused.
The moral of this story?
It's wonderful to have colleagues who are passionate about their work. Really, it is - it's one of the main perks of my job.
However, if you're so completely dedicated to your research that you make your colleagues have paranoid dreams about you letting them rot in a jail cell rather than disrupt your conversation about your latest results, maybe it's time to ease up a little, eh?**
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*the list under "contents of purse" included "iPhone". Under "contents of iPhone", I wrote "life". This dream was clearly trying to tell me many, many different things.
**none of my colleagues would ever actually do this for real. I don't think. I guess it depends on which project they're discussing.
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